I'm getting there...physically

THEY CUT ME!!!! The surgeon, I mean. Just over a month ago, I had surgery to help correct an injury that has plagued me for over 3 long, frustrating years. I'm happy to say the surgery was successful, and I'm now on the road to true recovery. It's gonna be a long, frustrating journey, but damnit I'm gonna get my stroll back! Please believe!

A little history....

Lemme tell ya, patellofemoral pain syndrome and chondromalacia of the knee are a BITCH to deal with.



Chondro-ma-what??? you say? Basically, due to faulty biomechanics, flat feet, and going WAY overboard with working out and dancing during college, my left knee does not smoothly glide in the groove that lies between my femur (thigh bone) and the bones of my lower leg. My kneecap veers out to the left, causing damage underneath the cap and this god awful nagging pain whenever I get into a squatting position. Which is NOT GOOD cuz' y'all know how I like to drop it like it hot! LOL.



Anyways, after 3 years of anti-inflammatory pills, trips to sorry ass physical therapists, trips to good physical therapists, and a 9 month foray with a chiropractor (which I HIGHLY recommend...especially the phine ones, hee hee)...no significant progress. When both my orthopedic doctor and my anti-surgery chiropractor decided to say 'fuck this we gotta get gully on this issue', I knew surgery was in order.

Luckily, surgery for this condition is super easy and minimally invasive. Poke 2 holes in the knee, stick a scope and camera through the holes, check out the joint for anything ugly, take out and/or repair anything ugly, make the kneecap nice and smooth, and THE END.



My doctor was not expecting to see too much nastiness in there considering the MRI and X-rays showed nothing. Well he went in there, and BABEE I could of had a cigarette when he was done. Hell, I don't even remember getting the anesthesia countdown. I woke up, my knee was wrapped, and I was being fed the most GLORIOUS narcotic medication through the IV. Ooh lawd now i see how folks grow addicted to that ish.

Once the PAIN that ensued after those wonder drugs wore off, it was time to get to business. I've been in physical therapy for the past six weeks, and things are coming around slowly but surely. I about damn near LOST IT when some of the nagging pain came back, but I was ensured that it was normal and a part of the healing process. I'm hoping they ain't lying, because I may have to cut a bitch for trying to placating me...3 years of a dream deferred is enough to make me come after somebody. But I digress :)



Physical therapy this time is fun because I really feel like I'm getting somewhere. I can pretty much squat w/no weight without pain which is PROGRESS people. My therapist was hella clowning me though because apparently my glutes (aka the big ol' booty muscles) aren't doing their job properly in maintaining my hip stability. Her remark:

Umm, Jammie....You have all that ASS, you better start using it!!

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO TAKE THAT?!!! I was DONE. I was offended and laughing hysterically all at the same time. This heifa actually said I had a 'dysfunctional booty'. Ain't that some shit? LOL.

I will say one thing though, Amy (my therapist) is getting me right together. We finally have been able to push the envelope a bit, and it feels GREAT to finally feel like I'm putting forth a real physical effort. I'm weak as hell, my balance is dismal, and I get nervous about using full pressure on my knee, but guess what? I'm one step closer to being fully functional!

I seriously dream of the day when I can just walk into a dance class and work hard without having to obsess over my knee and run for the ice pack right afterward. To be able to go out dancing and break it down like how I used to motivates me. The first day I can go to the gym and have a nice hard leg workout and get that delightful feeling of soreness the next day will be big for me.




This healing process is far from over, but now I look forward to what is to come. Having been physically humbled really makes me appreciate my body and what it does for me. Having my own physical struggle has made me a better fitness trainer and supporter for folks who have physical limitations. I've learned to give my body what it says it need, NOT what I think it needs or what I want to give it. Excellent lessons learned.

PLEASE BELIEVE THOUGH...WHEN I GET BACK TO 100%, BE PREPARED! Y'ALL AIN'T READY FOR THE STRONGER, FASTER, CONDITIONED, AND SMARTER DANCEHARD!!

Here is a youtube clip I look at every day for inspiration. It's from the Cirque du Soleil show "Zumanity", and it's absolutely beautiful. The masculine side of dance!